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Frustrating People Since 1971.

Archive for January 2009

A Model Citizen

with 2 comments

    

‘Vanity of vanities, says the Preacher, vanity of vanities! All is vanity.’  ~ Ecclesiastes 1:2

Some of you know (Ashlee won’t let me forget) that I once had a very–very–short-lived modeling career.  (Pause for laughter.)

My mama posted a couple of the newspaper shoots that I did on her Facebook page and, since I have nothing better to do than to laugh at myself, I thought I would post them here to give us all a chuckle.  (Fire at will.)

 

 

I think the title says it all, thank you.

 

 

I actually married Ashlee ten years later about two streets over from where we did this shoot in Calvert, Texas.

 Actually, modeling was sort of fun.  (Maybe I should dust off the old weight bench and make a comeback?)

  

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 31, 2009 at 7:22 pm

Posted in Silly

Music to my Ears

with 3 comments

    

I appears that the unfamiliarity with the song lyrics listed in the previous post was exceeded only by a combination of ambivalence and utter disdain for my taste in music.  Such is life–AND I MAKE NO APOLOGIES!! 🙂

The answers are listed in bold red following the lyrics (with the album title in parentheses).  (And please, people, expand a little bit and give some of these songs/ albums a try, huh?!)

 

  • Hot chili peppers in the blistering sun.  Dust on my face and my cape.’  ~ Bob Dylan, Romance in Durango (Desire)

 

  • ‘There’s a seabird above you, gliding in one place; like Jesus in the sky.’  ~ Jackson Browne, Rock Me On the Water (Saturate Before Using)

 

  • ‘Look around me.  I can see my life before me running rings around the way things used to be.’  ~ Crosby, Stills & Nash, Wasted On the Way (Daylight Again)

 

  • ‘Woke up this morning, smiled at the rising sun.  Three little birds, each by my doorstep.’  ~ Bob Marley, Three Little Birds (Exodus)

 

  • ‘A young cowboy named Billy Joe grew restless on the farm.’  ~ Johnny Cash, Don’t Take Your Guns to Town (Don’t Take Your Guns to Town)

 

  • ‘To me, he’s one of the heroes of this country.  So why is he all dressed up like those old men?’  ~ Jerry Jeff Walker, Desperados Waiting for a Train (Viva Terlingua!)

 

  • ‘Who did you say it was, brother?  Who was it fell by the way?  When whiskey and blood mixed together—did you hear anyone pray?’  ~ Nitty Gritty Dirt Band feat. Roy Acuff, Wreck On the Highway (Will the Circle Be Unbroken?)

 

  • ‘Yeah, Johnny Cash helped me get out of prison—long before Rodriguez stole that goat.’   ~ David Allen Coe, Longhaired Redneck (Longhaired Redneck)

 

  • ‘Sweet talking people done ran me outta town.  And I drank enough whiskey to float a battleship around.’  ~ Lynyrd Skynyrd, Gimme Back My Bullets (Gimme Back My Bullets)

 

  • ‘Almost busted in Laredo but for reasons that I’d rather not disclose.  But if you’re staying in a motel there make sure you don’t leave nothing in your clothes.’  ~ Willie Nelson, Me and Paul (Yesterday’s Wine)

 

  • ‘Clean this mess up, else we’ll all end up in jail.  Those test tubes and the scales—just get it all outta here.  Is there gas in the car?  Is there gas in the car?!!  (I think the people down the hall know who we are.)’  ~ Steely Dan, Kid Charlemagne (The Royal Scam)

 

 

    

  • ‘You have so much faith in me—you trust me anywhere.  But the reason (if they only knew) is that we just don’t care.’  ~ Merle Haggard, Just Between the Two of Us (Just Between the Two of Us)

 

  • ‘Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl but she doesn’t have a lot to say.  Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl but she changes from day to day.  I wanna tell her that I love her a lot but I gotta get a belly full of wine.  Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl, someday I’m gonna make her mine, oh yeah—someday I’m gonna make her mine.’  (That’s actually the entire song.)  ~ The Beatles, Her Majesty (Abbey Road)

 

  • ‘Well my time went so quickly; I went lickity-splitly out to my Ol’ 55.’  ~ The Eagles, Ol’ 55 (On the Border)

 

  • You know the story ’bout the jailhouse rock.  Go on and do it, but just don’t get caught.  They got ‘em all in the jailhouse, baby.’  ~ Waylon Jennings, Ain’t Living Long Like This (What Goes Around Comes Around)

 

  • ‘I’m a faithful follower of Brother John Birch, I belong to the Antioch Baptist Church and I ain’t even got a garage—you can call home and ask my wife!’  ~ Charlie Daniels Band, Uneasy Rider (Honey in the Rock)

 

  • ‘Then add the wedding bells, one house where lovers dwell, three little kids for the flavour.’ ~ Dean Martin, Memories Are Made of This (Memories Are Made of This)

 

  • ‘Well, I pray when I’m dead and the ages shall roll my body will blacken and turn into coal.  Then I’ll look from the gates of my heavenly home and pity the miner digging my bones.’  ~ Nitty Gritty Dirt Band feat. Merle Travis, Dark As a Dungeon (Will the Circle Be Unbroken?)

 

  • ‘Do you always trust the first, initial feeling?’  ~ Fleetwood Mac, Crystal (Fleetwood Mac)

 

  • ‘If anyone can help me, it’s me brother in the army—if I can find his station in Cork or in Killarney.’  ~ Whiskey in the Jar (Traditional Irish Ballad)

 

  • I was pushin’ through the crowd trying to get to where she’s at and I was campaign shouting like a Southern diplomat.’  ~ Chuck Berry, Nadine

 

  • ‘Pick up your gear and, gypsie roll on—roll on.’  ~ Allman Brothers, Melissa (Eat a Peach)

 

  • ‘They say, “Hey, you’re from down South and when you open your mouth you always seem to put your foot there.”’  ~ Gary P. Nunn, London Homesick Blues (Home with the Armadillo) 

 

 

 

  • ‘Oh, I’d love to spit some Beechnut in that dude’s eye and shoot him with my ol’ .45.’   ~ Hank Williams, Jr., A Country Boy Can Survive (The Pressure Is On)

 

  • ‘Well, you can call them country and they don’t care and if you don’t like the way they wear their hair you can take your likes and shove ‘em on up the line.  People in Texas don’t care if the sun don’t shine.’  ~ Charlie Daniels Band, Texas (Nightrider)

 

  • Update: I had to add this honourable mention that I just remembered:  ‘Sitting on a mountain looking at the sun.  Plastic majestic lobster telephone.’   ~ The Cult, Aphrodisiac Jacket (Electric)

         

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 31, 2009 at 10:09 am

Posted in Music

Brian’s Song

with 7 comments

 

 

OK, Brian threw down the gauntlet, so here are some lyric lines from 25 songs in MY music library.  Keep in mind that I have no ipod and my collection consists of wax cylinders—so I am choosing some of my favourite songs from my favourite albums.  (How many can YOU guess?)  [Ashlee is disqualified from playing.]

 

  • ‘Hot chili peppers in the blistering sun.  Dust on my face and my cape.’

 

  • ‘There’s a seabird above you, gliding in one place; like Jesus in the sky.’

 

  • ‘Look around me.  I can see my life before me running rings around the way things used to be.’

 

  • ‘Woke up this morning, smiled at the rising sun.  Three little birds, each by my doorstep.’

 

  • ‘A young cowboy named Billy Joe grew restless on the farm.’

 

  • ‘To me, he’s one of the heroes of this country.  So why is he all dressed up like those old men?’

 

  • ‘Who did you say it was, brother?  Who was it fell by the way?  When whiskey and blood mixed together—did you hear anyone pray?’

 

  • ‘Yeah, Johnny Cash helped me get out of prison—long before Rodriguez stole that goat.’

 

  • ‘Smooth talking people done ran me outta town.  And I drank enough whiskey to float a battleship around.’

 

  • ‘Almost busted in Laredo but for reasons that I’d rather not disclose.  But if you’re staying in a motel there make sure you don’t leave nothing in your clothes.’

 

  • ‘Clean this mess up, else we’ll all end up in jail.  Those test tubes and the scales—just get it all outta here.  Is there gas in the car?  Is there gas in the car?!!  (I think the people down the hall know who we are.)

 

  • ‘You have so much faith in me—you trust me anywhere.  But the reason (if they only knew) is that we just don’t care.’

 

  • ‘Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl but she doesn’t have a lot to say.  Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl but she changes from day to day.  I wanna tell her that I love her a lot but I gotta get a belly full of wine.  Her Majesty’s a pretty nice girl, someday I’m gonna make her mine, oh yeah—someday I’m gonna make her mine.  (That’s actually the entire song.)

 

  • ‘Well my time went so quickly; I went lickity-splitly out to my Ol’ 55.’

 

  • You know the story ’bout the jailhouse rock.  Go on and do it, but just don’t get caught.  They got ‘em all in the jailhouse, baby.’

 

  • ‘I’m a faithful follower of Brother John Birch, I belong to the Antioch Baptist Church and I ain’t even got a garage—you can call home and ask my wife!’

 

  • ‘Then add the wedding bells, one house where lovers dwell, three little kids for the flavour.’

 

  • ‘Well, I pray when I’m dead and the ages shall roll my body will blacken and turn into coal.  Then I’ll look from the gates of my heavenly home and pity the miner digging my bones.’

 

  • ‘Do you always trust the first, initial feeling?’

 

  • ‘If anyone can help me, it’s me brother in the army—if I can find his station in Cork or in Killarney.’

 

  • I was pushin’ through the crowd to get to where she’s at and I was campaign shouting like a Southern diplomat.’

 

  • ‘Pick up your gear and, gypsie roll on—roll on.’

 

  • ‘They say, “Hey, you’re from down South and when you open your mouth you always seem to put your foot there.”’

 

  • ‘Oh, I’d love to spit some Beechnut in that dude’s eye and shoot him with my ol’ .45.’

 

  • ‘Well, you can call them country and they don’t care and if you don’t like the way they wear their hair you can take your likes and shove ‘em on up the line.  People in Texas don’t care if the sun don’t shine.’

 

  • Update: I had to add this honourable mention that I just remembered:  ‘Sitting on a mountain looking at the sun.  Plastic majestic lobster telephone.’

     

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 29, 2009 at 1:34 pm

Posted in Music

Schiff v. Stein

with one comment

  

‘Our kings, our princes, our priests, and our fathers have not kept your law or paid attention to your commandments and your warnings that you gave them.’ ~ Nehemiah 9:34

This is awesome!  Peter Schiff was ridiculed and dismissed as a prophet of doom who saw nothing good on the economic horizon.  Guess what?  He was right.  This video montage demonstrates just how prescient–almost clairvoyant–Schiff was.  Pay special attention at the 6:25 mark when Ben Stein basically tells Schiff he is an idiot and that everyone should immediately buy stock in . . . Merrill-Lynch!  Classic.

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 27, 2009 at 5:10 am

Posted in economy

Who Would Conceive of Such a Thing?

with 2 comments

   

‘Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.’  ~ Psalm 127:3

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi wants you to stop having children.  They’re a burden on the Treasury, don’t you know!

Well, the family planning services reduce cost. They reduce cost. The states are in terrible fiscal budget crises now and part of what we do for children’s health, education and some of those elements are to help the states meet their financial needs. One of those – one of the initiatives you mentioned, the contraception, will reduce costs to the states and to the federal government.

  

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 26, 2009 at 12:22 pm

This Is Change?

with one comment

    

‘What has been is what will be,and what has been done is what will be done,and there is nothing new under the sun.’  ~ Ecclesiastes 1:9

As I predicted in this space during the primaries (which is a lifetime in political terms) Obama has not lived up to the peace candidate that so many wanted him to be–and that he promoted himself to be.

I also predicted that he would expand the GWOT in Afghanistan and probably into Pakistan.  I have to admit that, while I was not surprised that he has done just that, I was taken somewhat aback that he did it on the fourth day of his presidency.

Missiles fired from suspected US drones killed at least 15 people inside Pakistan today, the first such strikes since Barack Obama became president and a clear sign that the controversial military policy begun by George W Bush has not changed.

And, as usual, a number of the dead include women and children.

Meet the new boss.  Same as the old boss.  Indeed.

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 24, 2009 at 8:57 am

Posted in Silly

Broken Clocks and Also-Rans

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‘I am the God of Bethel, where you anointed a pillar and made a vow to me. Now arise, go out from this land and return to the land of your kindred.’  ~ Genesis 31:13

George McGovern was probably the most liberal/ Leftist candidate ever to run for President–until Obama.  But, just as a broken clock is correct twice a day, so he is making great sense regarding U.S. Middle East policy.

It would behoove Obama to consider his advice:

I have believed for some time that military power is no solution to terrorism. The hatred of U.S. policies in the Middle East – our occupation of Iraq, our backing for repressive regimes such as Egypt and Saudi Arabia, our support of Israel – that drives the terrorist impulse against us would better be resolved by ending our military presence throughout the arc of conflict. This means a prudent, carefully directed withdrawal of our troops from Iraq, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, Qatar and elsewhere. We also need to close down the imposing U.S. military bases in this section of the globe, which do so little to expand our security and so much to stoke local resentment.

 

      

Written by ninepoundhammer

January 23, 2009 at 8:27 am

Posted in Uncategorized